Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Bi-Polar

I believe that my response to my upcoming clinical exam is rapid cycling Bi-Polar disorder.

What seems like half a million times a day I go from thinking, "I can totally pass this exam. NOOOOooo problem." to "Oh MY GOD! I know nothing! How do I keep my job? My license! I will never pass this exam even if I studied every minute for the next six months!"

Good times. SUPER good times.

I have talked before about my uhhh..ahem...nervous tendencies.

Since I started this blog I don't recall being in any exam situations. So I am here to tell you that my level of anxiety where tests are concerned make my other "nervous tendencies" look like I am strolling happily in the park on a splendid summer's day.

It. Is. Ugly.

Generally I obsess for several days..then a day or two before the test I have a crying melt-down...then the morning of the test I am very nauseated, unable to eat, and have major stomach upset.

Not. Fun.

I do somehow manage to pull it together and take the exam. Which is good.

Hopefully this will be the last time I have to take an exam of this magnitude and importance.

Unless I decide to go back to school to become certified to be a school counselor.

That is still on the table.

Maybe this test experience will cure me of that idea.

Now I should call it a night.

Sigh.

2 comments:

Shari said...

You just have a more intense case of the text anxiety we all have. To some degree, we all get it all the time. It won't make you feel better, but you are not along with these feelings.

Shari said...

Or maybe I meant to say TEST anxiety. I'm guessing text anxiety is a whole different thing. :))